Winston Churchill was visiting another country.  The first 
evening there, at the state dinner, he pointed to the chicken
entree and said, "May I have some breast?"

The hostess raised her eyebrows and curtly responded, "Mr.
Churchill, in this country we ask for white meat or dark 
meat."

"My apologies, Madam, I was not aware of your customs."

The following day, a "thank you" gift was delivered to the 
party's hostess of a large orchid.  The following was written 
on the note:  "I would be obliged if you would pin this on your 
white meat -- W. Churchill"

*************

Linda and Jill are having coffee when Linda notices that Jill 
seems troubled and asks her, "Is something bugging you? 
You look anxious."

"Well, my boyfriend just lost all his money and life savings in 
the stock market," Jill explained.

"Oh, that's too bad," Linda sympathized. "I'm sure you're 
feeling sorry for him."

"Yeah, I am," Jill said. "He'll miss me."

**********************
This story is about an elderly couple, sitting together 
watching television.

During one of those commercials, the husband asked his 
wife, "Whatever happened to our sexual relations?"

After a long thoughtful silence, the wife replied during the 
next commercial,  "You know, I don't know. I don't even think 
we got a Christmas card from them this year."